The power of listening
The writing life begins with attention
My writing career began as a newspaper reporter. The job requires a lot, but in particular, two things: asking good questions, and attentive listening.
As we wind up our series on the writing life, I want to encourage you, friends. Ask good questions and listen carefully. Both are essential to the writing life.
Good writing offers a fresh perspective, a different angle, a shifted paradigm. You cannot access such insights without asking good questions, of yourself or of others.
However, it does no good to ask questions unless we are prepared to listen for answers. We must learn to pay attention: to circumstances, to other people, to the voice of love.
Whether that means meditation, prayer, or walking through life with intention and awareness, we can all learn to set aside distractions to simply listen.
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But our listening must be tempered with discernment. Many writers get stuck when they listen to the voice of shame—which might come from well-meaning friends or family members or might rise up from within.
Before we write, we must listen to our own life. What motivates us to write? Is it a desire for fame? Do we think getting published will fulfill our deepest longings? (Sorry to disappoint you, but it doesn’t.)
A writer pays attention and invites readers to do the same. Are you called to write? Maybe. I love Parker Palmer’s wisdom on vocation:
“Before you tell your life what you intend to do with it, listen for what it intends to do with you. Vocation does not come from willfulness. It comes from listening. I must listen to my life and try to understand what it is truly about—quite apart from what I would like it to be about—or my life will never represent anything real in the word, no matter how earnest my intentions.” (From Let Your Life Speak)
Many of us rush in, telling our life what it should be, rather than taking the time to listen.
We cannot listen in a hurry. We need to slow down, and set aside distractions (like our phone).
Writers grapple with questions about their own experiences, mining truth they can explore on the page. They also ask themselves—what are my readers asking about? What questions do they have? What keeps them up at night? And most importantly—what have I learned or wondered about that overlaps with my readers’ questions?
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Even if you are not writing self-help books, nearly any book touches a felt need of the reader. Writing demands that we listen well enough to know what that need is. And what motivates that listening? I believe it is love. Jesus taught that the best way to live is in a posture of receiving and giving love: love God and love your neighbor. Even if you’re a skeptic, this is a good way to live. When writers listen to the questions their neighbors (their readers) are asking, and respond with love (which can sometimes mean telling the truth), their writing becomes more powerful.
Our own stories become useful to others when we listen to our lives and find a way to articulate and make sense of what happened. We share our insights not in a misguided attempt to fix people, but to invite readers on a journey in which they, too, will ask good questions and listen well. A journey of self-discovery. They’ll realize they are not alone.
I am a writer, editor, publishing guide, and also, a writing coach. Many writers just want to tell their own story—which has value. But a book, essay or post that connects with readers will begin with listening, not just to our own musings, but to others. The powerful stories are the ones where a writer has listened to the voice of love, and the voices of others, enough to shine a light on truth for the reader. They are motivated not by desire for their own gain, but by love.
So often, writers get stuck because they listen to the wrong voice. They listen to the voice of shame, rather than the voice of love. I explore this more deeply in my book Listen: Finding God in the Story of Your Life. In that book, I encourage readers to listen to their life by asking three questions:
What do I love?
How have I struggled?
What is my desire?
These questions invite us to dive beneath the surface of our life, to find God in our story, to pay attention to the voice of love—even in the most difficult circumstances.
As you build a writing life, take time to listen. Pay attention to your own motivations, to what God is calling you to do. Then write!
P.S. If you order Listen, let me know! I’ll send you a free study guide to use for group discussion or individual reflection.
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